succor by Courtney Cantrell

dont pick at that

momma said

youll make it bleed

i wont forget

curled up in the rocking chair listening
as you yearn to watch over me

i wont forget

vulnerable to your gentle hands
you knead the pain from my soul

heal my winter

break my fall

even as the black dogs of your despair nip at your vitals

i wont forget

sobbing the hollowness from my heart

into yours

and your eyes like the sky

wide

welcoming

filled with the softest storms

that cleanse and soothe

i wont forget

enveloped in your sweetest darkness

hidden held whole

heart brought back to life

raw and wild

beating mad with the knowledge of what can and cannot be

i wont forget
tinged with crimson or no

still the memories are warm

and i drink them.

Courtney Says:

Hi, I'm Courtney Cantrell, and I am bad at writing bios. I much prefer writing and publishing fantasy novels. One series is paranormal and the other is epic, by which I mean "grand and magic-driven and quest-filled," not "totally cool, dude." At courtcan.com, I blog about the writing life, various daily oddities, chocolate and coffee, and vorpal unicorn morphing powers. Those are real. I have the blog post to prove it. I also have a husband and a daughter and a cat. And a quotes collection.

Blog: courtcan.com

Twitter: @courtcan

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Courtney-Cantrell-Author/137603379646899

Courtney's most recent novel is currently available on Amazon.

Courtney Cantrell

What more can I say about Courtney that I didn't tell you in her last post? How about The final book in her Demons of Saltmarch trilogy will be available very soon? Or she's the acquisitions editor for The Consortium, a group of writing professionals that is reinventing the way writers get published? Or, and this one's my favorite, her favorite exclamation is, "Cramazing!"

blueberry beer, u2, and a fedora

Find Shadows after Midnight
right now on Amazon

i stand at the bar 
a lifetime away from the stage as 
thoughts about my identity flood through me 

but i do not struggle to remember who i am

this time, i don’t need to know
because a brown fedora rests on the end of the keyboard. 

the singer claims he still hasn’t found
what he’s looking for 
but i say he’s discovered a rhythm to 
move my blood 
pulse my heart and
throb my core. 

i step forward 
into the open space at the foot of the stage
where the crowd does not dare tread 
in spite of their weizen, their vodka, 
their long island ice tea. 

to my name i have only blueberry beer
it hasn’t replaced my blood 
only infused me with delight 

no eyes on me
i walk on strains of melody 
and my toes tap a syncopated beat. 

at the foot of the stage
i look up 
into the keyboard player’s soul-questioning eyes
i reach up 
and do not blink as i pluck his brown fedora
from where it waits 

with his smile and nod in time to the song
he answers his own question as i step back 
yes 
behind me i feel the crowd’s shocked anticipation 
yes 
and i slide that fedora onto my head 

i let go

and i dance

my hands sweep down my every curve
my lips part to exhale joy 
my body undulates, intoxicated 
by nothing but passion. 

oh release.
how i have missed you. 

with the wondering eyes of the crowd on me
at the foot of the stage 
i dance 
i dance shake rattle and hum

i make love to life
wearing the keyboard player’s brown fedora 

that is how i think it could happen anyway 
as i stand a lifetime away at the bar 
and imagine. 


Courtney Cantrell is a writer of high fantasy, low sci-fi, and medium horror. The making of things and the sharing of those things with others is her passion. She enjoys chocolate and coffee and tries to keep these from making her sentences unnecessarily complicated. http://courtcan.com

Courtney Cantrell

Courtney is the pretty one, the cheerleader, the prom queen. I kid. Sort of. If the Kindle All-Stars were high school, she would be all those things, but she'd be the one everyone loves rather than the overly popular, Muffy Tepperman type. (To you younger readers, I say, "Google it.") She keeps us smiling with a positive attitude. She really is terrific for moral support and a voice of reason. Of course, she's also a mischievous little elf and we adore that side of her as well.

Courtney also writes the Demons of Saltmarch series and is quite the accomplished artist. I believe she painted the artwork for her book covers. And she's done quite a few for other authors. [ed. I was mistaken in that last bit. Courtney corrected me in the comments section below. Sorry kids!]

Colors of Deception, the first in the
Demons of Saltmarch series
can be found on Amazon for Kindle and in print

night sunshine


it's a hollow place
behind where cartilage attaches ribs to sternum
just a nudge to the right of my heart


i tell you, it's a hollow place
empty of tangible
my body curls protectively around it
shielding it
hiding it from prying eyes
and oh, it aches


if you cut me open
--no, listen!
if you cut me open there, 
you will find
a perfect sphere of translucent midnight
the darkness of what has slumbered too long


a latent, formless winter
in which rainstorms coalesce
and bear my passions to a far-off land
--like an embrace carried on thunder
and a kiss on the lightning


if you cut me open,
you will find this winter
dark and awakening
seamless and seemless


too definite to reject
too irresistible to ignore
and at its core burns
the evidence: night sunshine,


a miniature, incandescent star
nestled in the hollow place beside my heart
warmth spreads from my core
to my limbs
into my fingertips
waking me up
rising
giving life


night sunshine
unanticipated
irrevocable
welcome in everything it brings


if you cut me, you will see it:
night sunshine, 
seeping from my joyous wound
flashing brilliant and comforting
seemless winter banished
painful ache denied
resistance relinquished like a dull blade
--and gladly


if you cut me, it is yours--
that hollow place beside my heart
in which to make your home


and 
to mark your path,
the night sunshine
pointing the way
beckoning on
welcoming in


night sunshine
if you cut me,
i bleed ultraviolet.




Courtney Cantrell is a writer of high fantasy, low sci-fi, and medium horror. The making of things and the sharing of those things with others is her passion. She enjoys chocolate and coffee and tries to keep these from making her sentences unnecessarily complicated. http://courtcan.com